Come & take a ride in my Old Jalopy. I can pick you up anytime you want. You will love the smooth & quiet ride of my 2001 Chevy Venture Mini Van.
It is an unforgettable experience!
When I arrive to pick you up, you are sure to hear me getting out of the Van to ring your door bell because all 4 doors squeak when opened. I will get some WD-40, I promise. No worries, the doors will stay on their hinges while driving. I haven't lost any passengers yet.
You may want to bring ear plugs if you are easily startled, because the gas gauge spontaneously starts loudly dinging to alert me that I am almost out of gas even though I filled up yesterday. I seriously have a Heart Attack every car ride because that thing dings unexpectedly. I also see the gas gauge needle pulse back & forth between full & empty every ride. It can't make up its mind, & it sure plays tricks on mine. Again...no worries, I have never run out of gas & I have AAA, in case I ever do.
During the ride you may want to hold onto your hair pieces, hats & other loose articles, because we love to cruise with the windows rolled down in the summer time, enjoying the beautiful wind blowing in our faces...well really because the AC is broken & hasn't worked for 2 summers, but who is counting? I just wish we had a dog, so someone could appreciate the ride. The rest of us bring along hair brushes & hats to try & hide the wind blown do we receive upon arrival to our destinations. It ain't pretty, but we sure look unique!
While you are fixing your wind blown do, I will be using those extra minutes to roll up my drivers side window. The power windows work, but it gets off track & stuck somewhere in the middle & needs my guidance to roll itself the rest of the way up. I cannot leave them rolled down either, because there are a lot of people in the world eyeballing this Burgundy Beauty that I am driving & they may try to steal her if I leave the windows down & the doors unlocked.
I mean seriously, who wouldn't want a Mini Van that has a working engine? I'm just sayin...
If you need to borrow my Old Jalopy, you should be 5'7 & have a 33 inch inseam because Agent broke my drivers seat so it no longer is adjustable...feel free to contact me if you fit this description & need an awesome set of wheels...
but remember when you borrow the van not to put two drinks in the drink holder because it will collapse under the weight & they will spill. BIG FUN!
She has a few rust spots that give her character...but the engine purrs!
Did I mention she was paid off?
And that I am planning on driving Old Jalopy until the wheels fly off & the engine screams for mercy!
Dave Ramsey would be so proud!
What is your prize possession?
at least you have some very fond memories in your van.... can you ask for more than that??
ReplyDeleteMimi that is hysterical. I would laugh even more, except my Chrysler Town and Country is a 2000 and that's the newer car in our family. Hubby's is a 1995 Buick LeSabre!!!
ReplyDeleteSo this must be the van that had you stranded. I must say, she is a pretty looking oldie but goodie (a lot prettier than the ones I grew up with). Just the other day, my sisters and I were talking (and laughing) about how one of us used to have to ride in the hunchback of our car because there were so many of us and we couldn't afford a bigger car.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh....memories.....
Looks like I won't have a license to drive this bad boy since I'm only 5ft short, oh well :o( I'm so short that my pedals actually move forward. It was love at first sight.
Dave Ramsey would be proud and I don't know how you can stand it....lol Is it really that bad? I know at least it is clean.
ReplyDeleteLOL ... NOW we know why your girls wear hats! The secret is out!
ReplyDeleteI am a couple of inches taller than you, so I guess the van is out for me. Besides, my husband has put his foot down, "I will never have a mini-van!" You know, the "married man, married man, drives around in a mini-van -- got a wife, and some kids -- his whole life is on the skids" song. lol He refuses to fit the mold.
:o)
I was going to say "but I bet she's paid off" and she is so she looks very attractive right now :)
ReplyDeleteYou're hilarious, my friend. You're right...Dave Ramsey would indeed be proud. You're a poster child for him! :) And I'm cracking up at Beth's comment about why your girls wear hats...ha!
ReplyDeleteOh Mimi!!! I know, I know!!! My husband stole my little sports car (because it gets better gas mileage) and has left me with his red Pontiac Montana mini-van. It also has no air conditioning and this is Arkansas and it is SO HOT!!! There's no need to take a shower because by the time you get to where you're going in this small town, you're hot, sweaty and stinky anyway. blah! The driver side window doesn't work, so I can only roll down the passenger side one, so no need for a brush to tame the new do since no air circulates through to mess up my hair. I want to turn into G.I. Jane and get my car back!! :D
ReplyDeleteThat's how I feel about my "sport" minivan. She's old school but reliable. Kids I carpool with wait for the side doors to open and I have to tell them they have to open it. Ha! She's a good car and I hope will last for a few more years...having no car payment is nice.
ReplyDeleteWEll, she certainly wears her blemishes well! Looks great! I drive an '03 Yukon with over 90,000 miles...the air conditioning works, but something inside the dash knock when it's on...so I'm always answering "Who's There?" The kids still think this is funny! And, it has a remote start, which is great in the winter, but sometimes we get stranded at Walmart because the ignition is stuck or something...so I turn the key, and nothing...try the remote...nothing...after a couple of tries, she wakes up! So fun! And she has a lovely number '1' etched in the side when Alex thought it was ok to draw on it with chalk! I just love driving a 'Mom Taxi'! haha!
ReplyDeleteOh man... I'll quit complaining about what I drive. I drive a 2002 Ford Explorer, and one window sticks and needs assistance being rolled up. I hit a deer in it last year, so the front bumper has been GLUED back into place (looks white-trashy), but my AC works. In Texas - that is a MUST!!!
ReplyDeleteMimi, I'd still go ridin' with ya! The wind in your hair is sometimes a fun thing!
Mimi you are crazy...lol! Yeah but it's paid off and runs:)
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet ride! I think to not have car payments, I could easily live with all of that save for the broken a/c. I too live in Texas, and though I lived without it my first two summers driving, I choose not to suffer that again. Thanks for a laugh this morning!
ReplyDeleteWhat a blessing to not have car payments! :D I drive a 2003 Camry which is paid off. I love it! Dh drives a 2005? Jeep Liberty that we are trying to get paid off by hopefully the beginning of next year. :D
ReplyDeleteHe would be proud and so am I! You go girl...drive it proudly! That is exactly what I am gonna do with my car now that we bought and aren't leasing anymore! I am so excited to pay it off and then drive it until it collapes! We may even drive it to MI! (not this summer, but some summer!)
ReplyDeleteBut seriously...is it gonna make it with us down there?!!! ;) and be able to transport us all over?!
I love the little remark-Dave Ramsey would be proud-we don't use any of his things, i just know about him and think your humor is great. The line about hair pieces atc-too funny. Hope your 'puter gets better;)blessings amanda
ReplyDeletehaha! Love it! Though I'm too short to drive it! My poor little Focus has lost it's handle to roll up the driver side window... When we get our money we'll probably keep "Sally" and fix a few things, but we'll be getting a SUV for sure...
ReplyDeleteI love it! I would love to borrow your ol' Jalopy sometime, but I'm an SUV kinda girl. I'm just impressed that you don't have a car payment. I'm looking forward to that day. I just hope the Envoy makes it that long.
ReplyDeleteSo funny but is this what you are bringing to NC/VA? That's ok, I remember you saying you had AAA. The outside looks much better than how you describe the inside. It could be worse - at least you aren't having to walk...yet.
ReplyDeleteSo funny!! No wonder y'all always wear hats! I could deal with everything but the a/c issue. Here in south MS, there is no such thing as no a/c! Especially with little ones. The inside of our cars hit the mid-100's easy on the miserable dog days-I mean beautiful sunny days, and even the window's down can't really break through that heat! I feel SORRY for the people here who don't have it.
ReplyDeleteJen
Oh Mimi that was sooo funny. I am so excited to get our paid off, and I am sure I will drive it until it dies. Isn't if funny how our priorities change?
ReplyDeleteHope your computer gets well soon.
Elaine
Yes, Dave Ramsey would be very, very proud!!! LOL!
ReplyDeleteGreat Post!
ReplyDeleteI never would have thought to write about something like that!!
I catch "New Car Fever" really easily, so I have only ever paid off 1 vehicle. I have to trade every couple of years, but I'm gonna try to keep this one a while!!
LOL!! love it. yay for it being paid off. my husband's aunt drove around a van with over 200,000 miles, deer damage, hail damage and no radio for years. she called it 'god's van'. :0)
ReplyDeleteKnow how you feel...but paid off is good! :)
ReplyDeleteHope your computer gets better soon!
Very funny!!!! oh yeah, we drive our vehicles into the ground before we get another one. So does our son, lol! My hubby got a faceful and mouthful of antifreeze last night, thanks to my son's car.
ReplyDeleteSo at least your car hasn't attacked you yet.
What a fun post!!
ReplyDeleteHope your computer is fixed soon!!
Oooo...I love that Jalopy!!! Girl if it is paid off then it is GOLD!!! Says Dave Ramsey, Agent and the wanna ba (me)!!! ;)
ReplyDeleteI love a paid off vehicle, no matter how old and falling apart. Paid for is good!
ReplyDeleteThat is too funny! I feel like everytime I drive my vehicle something new breaks!! The back window are starting to get slower and slower when I roll them up, the passenger door thinks it isn't closed when really it is, and the back lift has a lovely crack in it the size of the Grand Canyon! But my AC works...so I guess I'm going pretty good!
ReplyDeleteNow I understand your love relationship with hats! :o)
ReplyDeleteBut like you said...it's paid for and that makes her worth a million dollars in your book, right?
Love the ode to your jalopy. Our Trailblazer is on its way to becoming one. Just paid the puppy off last year. Keeping our fingers crossed that it makes it at least 3 more years... :)
ReplyDeleteNow I know why you guys always wear hats :) It may be a jalopy, but at least it's clean, which is more than I can say for my van, which my husband calls "oscar's trash can" and insists he's gonna get me a stuffed oscar for the dash
ReplyDeleteWell, I do not feel TOO sorry for you, we also only have a 2001 Dodge van, and I am carless (is that a word) because we just gave our 1991 Dodge van that I used to drive to my nephew. We have three vehicles parked at our house now, but one belongs to my son, one to my daughter, and my husband takes the van to work…I never knew I would feel so left out. :(
ReplyDelete♥Hope
I have owned a few cars that fit this description over the years. We've always bought our vehicles with cash and sometimes that means ya take what you can get.
ReplyDeleteI remember when our very old mini van died and my husband and brother drove to the next state to pick up this "awesome new (to us)Jeep cherokee he had found on line. Well, about dinner time my sister and I were playing cards waiting for their return, when, all of a sudden, there was this incredible noise. My sister asked me what on earth was that racket. I looked at her and said, "it must be my new car."
Two minutes later, in walks hubby and brother,sure enough that was my new car. It wasn't so bad, though. The air conditioning worked-even if the heat didn't. And it only caught fire once.
Despite it's flaws, I was sorry a year later when we outgrew it and had to upgrade to a Suburban.
I have a lovely memories of a Chevy Lumina (the light of the world?:) and a '89 Chevy suburban and a station wagon SW2 from Saturn - Gold in color ... hummm and my current SUV Vue ... whew - glad that company will go on.
ReplyDeleteLoved the part about the dinging warning of the gas gauge ....LOL!
Mimi...you are too funny!
ReplyDeleteoh no, that's not good NO AC!!! I always get the hand me down car from hubby and drive it to the ground...i'm usually ok until the AC gives out, then it becomes a bit of a nightmare!!!
ReplyDeleteBut I LOVE not having a car payment... that makes me very happy!!!!!
Great description of the ol jalopy!
LOL! We have a Saturn SL1 in the same condition, but it is paid off and it still drives, so why give it up. Although, I have to say, we had to get a second car, so I only drive the new one, because we can't let the baby suffer (yea right), lucky hubs gets stuck with the Saturn. Funny!
ReplyDeleteOur van was 13 years old before we got another vehicle. One friend said I snuck up on her at her house because she couldn't hear my van a block away anymore.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter cried when we bought a newer vehicle.
Great story.
Nannette