......that I would have two chins when I was pregnant and ankles the size of a small continent.
......that the word "mom" would both thrill and exhaust me someday, depending on the circumstances and the time of night, how tired I was and how many times it was repeated.
......that children cannot hear you the first 12,000 times you say no.
......that you should NOT buy a puppy when you are experiencing baby-itis (aka wanting to have another baby).
......that you can gain 25-50 pounds during pregnancy (or more) and then you give birth to a 7 or so pound baby. What about the rest of it? Where does it go? Does that seem fair to you?
......that you can still be carrying baby weight when your baby is 16.....years, not months. Again, does that seem fair to you?
......that you would not flinch at somebody wiping their nose on your sleeve, your shoulder, or even your hand if it's available.
......that you would someday lick your thumb and try to clean something off of your husband's face, much to his horror.
......that you would actually swap birth stories with a group of women while eating, for goodness sake!!!!
......that playing a rousing game of who-changed-the-last-poopy-diaper with your husband would be such an argument starter. Who knew?
......that you would be wearing maternity clothes home from the hospital as well as into the hospital.
......that asking for an epidural the minute you walk into the hospital, in labor, is only good for a laugh as far as your doctor is concerned.
Who knew being a mom would be so entertaining?!
oh so true!
ReplyDeleteI'm still trying to lose some of that weight I gained from pregnancy...4 years later. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteMy husband says that the only topic woman can dicuss to together is chocolate and our uteruses!! Many he is right but I never thought of that as a gross thing to do together!!
ReplyDeleteI don't think my boys hear no the first 12,000,000 times I say it! And too funny but oh so true about gaining all that weight and taking home a 7 pound baby! I'm still working on my baby weight...and probably will be for a while!
ReplyDeleteSo funny, so true, who knew!
ReplyDeleteI certainly didn't!
ReplyDeletebest.motherhood.post.ever.
ReplyDeleteWould it be ok if I added it to the cool finds of the month?
lol soooooooooooooooo true lol
ReplyDeleteYou are so right-- and even if I'd been told, I wouldn't have believed it!
ReplyDeleteOh, I remember how mad I was when I realized I couldn't just slide back into skinny clothes when I left the hospital. I was NOT a happy camper to have to leave wearing maternity clothes. Ugggh.
ReplyDeleteAnd I gained about 45 lbs with each of my babies. Yea, that was NOT a pretty sight. OH WELL. =0)
Great post, Nan!
I pray I am on the low end of that pregnancy weight!! I gained 38 with my last one and am hoping to keep it lower this time around. I wipe my kid's nose with his shirt, my sleeve, and sometimes the hem of my dress. Ah, such is life as a mommy!
ReplyDeleteTOOO Funny!! and sooooo true!!
ReplyDeletesuch a cool post :D and i agree with you :)
ReplyDeleteLaughing out loud.
ReplyDeletethanks! I needed that!
I've told you before I think but gaining only 7 lbs. during pregnancy actually has jumpstarted my desire to get back to my high school weight. It's a slow go at it though. Most of these apply to me in some shape or form. It is entertaining for sure!
ReplyDeleteThat is cute!
ReplyDeleteFunny as always you silly thing. :o)
ReplyDeleteThese are so funny! The maternity clothes did always stun me. After the big ball is gone. You would think that you would be a lot smaller. But no! It takes weeks for you to not look still 6 months pregnant
ReplyDeleteSo true! No one ever told me how painful breastfeeding would be for the first two weeks! My husband always laughs because my girlfriends and I will rehash birth and breastfeeding stories over and over and over!
ReplyDeleteSo very true!! I think everything you have mentioned has been true in my house! And I did wear maternity clothes in and outta the hospital and for a few weeks after, as a matter of fact!!
ReplyDeleteI was so stunned that I couldn't wear my same jeans after having Alex the day after! LOL! What? Why aren't these going up past my knees...! Ugh! I still find that my body seems to have shifted in some areas! Yikes! haha!
ReplyDeleteGreat memories, Nan. I'm glad that my kids are older now, but they are so darn cute and fun when they're little.
ReplyDeleteAbout the maternity clothes after giving birth...the worst thing I ever said to a friend when I popped in to see how she was doing "Haven't you had that baby yet?" You could have heard a pin drop. A lot of her family were at her house that day which should have been a clue, but not for single, clueless me.
She was wearing this huge fluffy housecoat and sitting down. I didn't see the newborn baby someone else in the room was holding. I blurted that out & immediately I felt like an idiot. I hope I'll never say that again.
Fun times!
Nannette
Yeah... I lost all my weight and then some... tell me why I weigh more than when I first got pregnant now... ugh...
ReplyDeleteA) My mom did wear her skinny clothes home after she had me and never let me forget it.
ReplyDeleteB) As my friend once described it, "After you have a baby, you have everything you had before you had a baby...unfortunately, none of it is where you left it!"
you just don't read these in the "What to expect" books do you.
ReplyDeletethankfully, those little ones are so darn cute, they make it all worthwhile!
Ummm...who gains only 7 pounds when pregnant??? I will personally hunt her down and stuff her full of twizzlers. It'll give the rest of us a bad rap!
ReplyDeleteAnd by the way...no one ever told me that after nursing my boobs would not be the same size again and they would look like 2 deflated baloons and they would never return to their original position without help from Victoria's Secret.
lol. yep. but i was warned about the whole maternity clothes in and out of the hospital. just not EIGHT months AFTER. :0)
ReplyDeleteGuess I have something to look foward too when I get pg and have kiddos :)
ReplyDelete~Elyse
Nan, has anyone told you how funny you are? Yeah, I thought so. You must hear that one all the time!
ReplyDeleteI've got a confession. Just between you and me (yeah, right), I was wearing some maternity capris yesterday (3yrs after bringing home the baby). That's pretty bad. In my defense, I must say that they really don't look like they're maternity. I know, it's STILL pretty bad.
SOOOO true!....And so humorously sad :)
ReplyDeleteLOL! These are soooo true! Nodding my head...
ReplyDeletefantastic post one which we can all relate to! I still have my two chins and will be checking out your post on weight loss next!
ReplyDeleteLove Collette xxx
Very funny :D
ReplyDeleteWe do the poopie diaper one. all. the time.