Tuesday, May 26, 2009

YOU AND ME AND THE DMV.........

I know that all states don't list a person's weight on their driver's license anymore but, for the sake of today's post, please remember back in the day when they did.

Because. It's. Confession. Time!!!! 'Fess up people. Does anybody actually weigh the weight listed on their driver's license?

I'm just wondering because when I first got my license I was pretty skinny. Not my fault, just couldn't gain weight (Sadly I seem to have overcome that problem now, however, sigh.....). Several years and children later it still showed me at the same weight. So how come the people at the DMV (Dept. of Motor Vehicles) didn't call me a liar? Clearly I am not the weight of a teenaged child anymore.

How come the people didn't laugh in my face and say "you have GOT to be kidding me" when I went to get my license renewed? How come they didn't reach across the counter and grab me by the neck and squeeze until my eyes bulged and forced me to tell the truth? How come they still gave me a license, knowing they couldn't trust me to tell the truth????? How come???

They know I'm a liar. It says so on my driver's license. Right under the part that says "weight." Still, they believe that they can trust me enough to allow me to have a license. Talk about putting their faith in me........I promise I won't let you down, DMV.

Still, the guilt. Oh the guilt of it all!!!!! Every time I tried to correct it and tell them my true weight the lady behind the counter kept telling me "Oh it doesn't matter....You'll lose it eventually...." and she never changed it. Giving me eternal hope.......and eternal guilt.

In my defense I had good intentions. I figured I probably would never get down to that weight again, since I was pretty underweight to begin with, but I figured I might at least get in the same zipcode or ballpark, or state, or country, or planet, or solar system......

That's kind of the theory behind buying a pair of cute jeans in a smaller size. In theory, you have every intention of being able to fit into them. They are the catalyst, the inspiration, the motivation for your desire to lose the "last five-ten-twenty pounds of baby weight" you gained recently.

So what if your baby is 20? There's still hope! Don't tell me you've never done this, or if not done it, you've at least thought about it. I know you have. Haven't you? You mean you never have? Not even once? You mean I'm all alone in this? Bummer.....

O.k., maybe one person hasn't, and you know who you are, Erica!!!!!! Ahem. So people, if you're not sure about where you stand in all this, go weigh yourself and then go check your driver's license. Make sure you're sitting down first, you wouldn't want to hurt yourself when you pass out. Not trying to accuse you of lying of course, we all forget things.....

I wonder if the people at the DMV are trained for this. I wonder if they are put in a little room and forced to watch hysterically funny shows and not be allowed to laugh outloud or even twitch. I wonder if they are forced to have people lie to their faces all day long and learn not to blink an eye. I wonder if they lie on their driver's license?



31 comments:

  1. LOL ... Nan! You're a mess. Thankfully in NC we don't have to share such details. What good is it anyway? People can gain 50 pounds or lose it in a year -- so what good are those numbers?

    I usually get stumped on what color hair I have ... well, it WAS blonde, but thanks to high lights it doesn't look so BROWN now. How do I answer such a question? I feel like I lie too. And when I say brown, it doesn't reflect my picture. Oh the agony!

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  2. Oh...yikes! I haven't looked at my driver's license in years...I don't want to know what it says! I think it expires next year...surely I'll still weigh the same by then...right?

    I've heard that they don't want you to smile for your picture anymore,either...that will look lovely! Can't wait to go and get my new license!

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  3. Too funny. Yeah, I would definately be a liar if they had that on Michigan licenses.

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  4. Oh my goodness!! You had me in stitches...it's too early woman! What are you trying to do to us?!? I recently had mine renewed. I left the DMV feeling as if I had been carded :) I remember thinking to myself, "Did she think I really still weighed that or did she just know better than to ask", heehee! It was a total compliment & I'm stickin' to it! Since the woman didn't ask my weight, I technically haven't lied...right?!?

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  5. man if anyone ever paid attention to that on my license they would die laughing.....

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  6. Yea Nan, if you move to Texas --- they don't even ask you that! Your post made me pull out my DL and look. No weight on it!

    And yes, I knew you were talking to ME when you said that anyway. Goofy girl!

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  7. Too funny!

    I consider my driver's license weight a motivation tool.....

    ......yes. that makes me feel better.

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  8. Yes...here in AZ the weight is on your DL; and not only your weight, but get this...once you have your license, you don't renew it until your turn 65...that's right, mine expires in 2038!! Will my picture even look like me, will my weight be even remotely close...I think not!! Have a good day!

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  9. Well, the last time I got my driver’s license renewed with an updated photo, I was pregnant with my 5th child, and not only that, my face was blotchy red. To make matters worse, the lady taking the photo did not even wait for me to finish looking up after pointing to the red tape at which I was to align my toes. There I was, following her orders, and just as I was glancing up, she took my photo, so my eyes are almost half closed. I do not think anyone ever can get past looking at the unattractive photo to even see my listed weight.
    ♥ Hope

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  10. Oh no I never tell. :) Shh don't tell anyone though! As a matter of fact I hate going to the dmv so much that I renewed online last year so I didn't have to deal. That of course means that next time I have to go in no matter what :(

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  11. My DL weight has always been the weight I hope to achieve. I know now I will never achieve that, unless I never eat again. I'm only 7 pounds over that weight, so next DL weight may have to go up 5 pounds.

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  12. LOL! Hmmm, I have to go check mine now. Well, it doesn't have weight on it but it is a hideous pic. It was taken before I went to Japan probably 7 years ago? I did have a military id just renewed which does have my weight on it. He asked me "is this the correct weight?" i just was like "mmmm, hmm" like several years ago. I need to go to the altar now.

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  13. I'll blab my age to anyone ( I'm 44), but my weight is a secret. Even my husband doesn't know the actual number. I've lost quite a bit, but still need to lose more. Even at my goal weight I think the number just sounds "fat". So I will never give my real weight, unless it's a medical emergency. It's no body's business, right? Am I right?

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  14. I would have to say that I am a big fat liar when it comes to my DL weight....no pun intended!!!

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  15. Hey Nan. You're so funny. Fortunately, I don't have to tell them how much I weigh. I just had to get mine renewed and I was SO nervous. Every time I have to renew it, I get so scared that I'm gonna fail the eye test. I'm such a scare-ty cat. But I should be wearing contacts or glasses. Fortunately, I passed the test and it turns out that my eyes aren't as bad as I thought. SHEW, what a relief! Thank goodness I don't have to reveal my weight to them.

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  16. Funny, I had to take my DL out and see if my weight was on there. I remembered they asked, and honestly I do give them a ballpark #, usually within 5 pounds. I figure that way I am just a fibber not a real liar. I do hate however when I am honest about my weight and someone goes..."I would never had guessed!" Ugh. Goes to show it really is just a number...you can look some what decent and then you tell someone the number and you feel like you should be signing up for The Biggest Loser. We need to get rid of those numbers...once and for all!

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  17. I will remain in denial thank you. I refuse to check my license and I definitely refuse to weigh myself. I can't even remember what size I was on my license...surely it isn't the size I am in now. LOL WW here I come.

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  18. Um yeah, I think that the cops use it here to make you feel like a moron. They always say, is this you on your license? No, its the skinier version of me...Thanks!

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  19. I'll post my driver's license photo just for you, Nan, as soon as I can get it scanned.
    ♥ Hope

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  20. So true, I try to get them to change my weight number, but they never do. I am actually glad, but like Beth said we can gain or lose 50 pounds in one year. Our hair color can change every month. Honestly though, if I lost 50 lbs. like one of blogger friends has, I would want the change made. Funny thought, Nan. Thanks for the laughs.
    Nannette

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  21. No mine is not accurate and usually they don't ask. But if they do, I just answer it's close enough!!! hahaha

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  22. I always think of my weight on my license as what I see by faith. Unless I am reminded by seeing myself in a picture, it really is what I think I weigh. For some reason, i can get the mirror to agree but those pictures will not line up with me.LOL

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  23. I now posted my DL photo.
    Come and see!
    ♥ Hope

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  24. Yep, when I had to give up my SC driver's license when I moved to British Columbia, I noticed that it still had the same weight that I declared to be when I was 16 years old! My BC license... the weight is in KG so I have NO CLUE what it really says!

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  25. Okay... just did the conversion from KG to LB... IF I ever finish losing all the weight that I hope to lose, I will honestly weigh what the license says. Something tells me it's never going to happen!

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  26. Okay, I just went and checked my driver's license and thankfully no weight listed. I can get away with fudging my weight a little because I am so short and "compact" so I actually weigh more than I look like I do...I once told my husband how much I REALLY weigh (when I was 25 pounds heavier) and he didn't believe me until I stood on the scale and he asked me, "where do you put it?" Being short and squatty CAN have its advantages I guess....

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  27. Funny but sooo true! I always said if I commit a crime, they would never catch me because they would be looking for a TOTALLY different woman than the one on my driver's license. =)

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  28. LOL! I don't think I stayed the weight on my Driver's License for much more than a year...certainly not after three children and 28 years...glad I'm not the only one.

    Add in the changing hair color over the years and I'll make a clean get away.

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  29. Hesitantly raising my hand, don't egg me! My weight is listed and I do not weigh the same, I weigh less.

    One person I showed my license to last month said, "Holy $**t! What happened to you?"

    Um thanks, I'll take that as a compliment?

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  30. Depends one when I got my license. LOL. I have had so many different weights. what about the weight when I had my first baby! Boy, now that would be horrible to go to the DMV then!
    But to be honest I don´t think I have ever had to put my weight on my license.

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  31. I am scared to see what my driver's license says now but... I know that when I applied for it when I was sixteen, I weighed 89 pounds. I don't remember ever updating it. I don't remember even having the option to change it. Just took a new picture and then did the eye test...but I did renew it so maybe I did update it...7 kids later I do know I don't weigh 89 pounds anymore!

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