I know that all states don't list a person's weight on their driver's license anymore but, for the sake of today's post, please remember back in the day when they did.
Because. It's. Confession. Time!!!! 'Fess up people.
Does anybody actually weigh the weight listed on their driver's license?I'm just wondering because when I first got my license I was pretty skinny. Not my fault, just couldn't gain weight (Sadly I seem to have overcome that problem now, however, sigh.....). Several years and children later it still showed me at the same weight. So how come the people at the DMV (Dept. of Motor Vehicles) didn't call me a liar? Clearly I am not the weight of a teenaged child anymore.
How come the people didn't laugh in my face and say "you have GOT to be kidding me" when I went to get my license renewed? How come they didn't reach across the counter and grab me by the neck and squeeze until my eyes bulged and forced me to tell the truth? How come they
still gave me a license, knowing they couldn't trust me to tell the truth????? How come???
They
know I'm a liar. It says so on my driver's license. Right under the part that says "weight." Still, they believe that they can trust me enough to allow me to have a license. Talk about putting their faith in me........
I promise I won't let you down, DMV.
Still, the guilt. Oh the guilt of it all!!!!! Every time I tried to correct it and tell them my true weight the lady behind the counter kept telling me "Oh it doesn't matter....You'll lose it eventually...." and she never changed it. Giving me eternal hope.......and eternal guilt.
In my defense I had good intentions. I figured I probably would never get down to that weight again, since I was pretty underweight to begin with, but I figured I might at least get in the same zipcode or ballpark, or state, or country, or planet, or solar system......
That's kind of the theory behind buying a pair of cute jeans in a smaller size. In theory, you have every intention of being able to fit into them. They are the catalyst, the inspiration, the motivation for your desire to lose the "last five-ten-twenty pounds of baby weight" you gained recently.
So what if your baby is 20? There's still hope! Don't tell me you've never done this, or if not done it, you've at least
thought about it. I know you have. Haven't you?
You mean you never have? Not even once? You mean I'm all alone in this? Bummer.....O.k., maybe one person hasn't, and you
know who you are,
Erica!!!!!!
Ahem. So people, if you're not sure about where you stand in all this, go weigh yourself and then go check your driver's license. Make sure you're sitting down first, you wouldn't want to hurt yourself when you pass out. Not trying to accuse you of lying of course, we all forget things.....
I wonder if the people at the DMV are trained for this. I wonder if they are put in a little room and forced to watch hysterically funny shows and not be allowed to laugh outloud or even twitch. I wonder if they are forced to have people lie to their faces all day long and learn not to blink an eye.
I wonder if they lie on their driver's license?