Wordless Wednesday..BUSTED! How Many Did He Eat???

T~A~R~A~H

When bad things happen to GOOD people {me}

You know when you need a pedicure...BAD?

Yeah like where your flip flops actually break because they are TIRED of carrying your pathetic toes...

{NOT an actual photo of me you know that I don't own those pants anymore}

So, I am rushing...and rushing....and I should have pulled into here:

But somehow, I decided to park here.....

C'mon..they look alike!!!

So..Did I get one of these?

Nope...Because I am blessed AND because I am a

{Sweet Talker}

So tell me..when was your last BRUSH with the law???

Tarah

When 5 Year Olds Make Decisions....

OK OK...So I have not posted in over a month on this blog

{muy muy apologies for that one ladies}

Well I am about to make up for that one right now.

I mean this post and this post alone will make you wet your pants!

So, onto the story.

He has been requesting for weeks....

Mom and Dad have been very hesitant because we knew what would happen.

But THIS 5 year old was determined....

Determined to be BALD.

*Parenting Tip: Do not let your 5 year old make decisions that will alter his self confidence in 3 seconds flat!

Remember this kid...you know HAIR..GLASSES {yada yada}....

Well this is the BEFORE photo;)

*WARNING: THIS IS ABOUT TO GET UGLY..OVERT YOUR EYES!

The I'm Gunna Be BALD EXCITMENT Shot....

The I just turned 75 and I am still excited! Otherwise known as "THE OLD MAN"

The "I Can't Believe that my mom did not stop me...what am I doing to myself" LOOK

*Poor Baby*

The..I'm not just MAD, I'm ANGRY face / look.

So, I am well aware of the Mother of Year Award that I just lost out to the woman who locked her kids in the car while she decided to gamble at the casino but I guess my son will now realize what the term BALD means and I will no longer have to hear about that one!

Hope to catch up with all of you soon....Life in the fast lane has been insane lately!!!

Tarah

Chuckle...

I have been a little blue...

I'm trying to snap out of it, I feel UNMOTIVATED and OVERWHELMED!

I wake up early, go to bed late and in the middle I feel like I am spinning my wheels...

and THEN..THEN, I saw this photo and it made my day!

Just had to share!

Hope you are all feeling ready for spring!

Tarah

You know what they say......

What will you do today?

Me {thanks for asking}

I'm planning on dressing my kids up as ♣leprochauns♣,

wearing green & making 4 leaf clover pancakes and split pea soup for dinner w/ green milk! Yummo!

Hope you enjoy the day!

♣Tarah♣

5 Mom's Masterpiece

It's Official.

I'm a lunatic.

No matter how hard I try, sometimes I see the world in different shades of green, red, blue.

Kinda like Andy Warhol {but without the funky glasses}.

I'm not done collecting my photos of wacky-ness.

I had only 2 poor souls awesome bloggers send me their goods, and I need more to create a masterpiece!

 5 ~ Moms~ Masterpiece

So, while you are pondering what you are going to send me,

I'm going to give you a little laugh at the expense of the "other" 4 Moms.

I always thought she would look great as a punk rocker! Watch out Cyndi Lauper....

Oooo...somewhat dark and mysterious, but so Beautiful!!!

Does anyone else think that Miti Toots Rainbows..
I mean after last weeks post we know she has issues!

Somehow E gotta little green boog coming outta her nose...

sorry E, I tried to fix it but gave up after try 25!!! ;)

{She still looks amazing inverted}

I tried something fun and funky and I was not expecting Marge Simpson's hair color. I know that Nan will forgive me for this one because as you can see there is NOOO beehive anywhere in this photo!

 PS, Nan DOES not condone Marge Simpson's behavior...she is a MUCH nicer wife ;)

Does anyone else think that I look like Boy George? Kinda weird.

Bottom Line....SEND ME YOUR CRAZY PHOTOS!!!

Boy George Lookalike

Tarah

*Note, this is unauthorized use of their photos.*

All legal complaints can be sent to:

Who Cares

1111 Right Back Atcha Ln

In case you wondered...Im on Vacation!

Did I forget to blog last week? Yes.

Did I tell a friend I would meet her for coffee and accidentally stand her up...GUILTY

Do I normally call my mom every day but for some reason there just isn't enough time lately?

(What the heck is my deal)????

I realized what my problem is.....I've been on Vacation!

Not the kind of vacation that I want to be on like this one...

But more of a vacation like this one...

One of these days, I am going to snap out of it. I am just not sure when.

Soooo...Here is what I have decided.

I want C-R-A-Z-Y pictures of all of you!

Send them to my email address: tarah.fenn@gmail.com

We are going to run a little contest. I don't know what you will win...but rest assured,

it WILL NOT be a vacation to St.Lucia!!!

Tarah

Finding the Postitive....

My family is the definition of Sports MANIA!

I mean my personal blog title is Eyeglasses & Endzones for a reason!

Yes, I live in Minnesota.

 Yes, we stole Brett Favre.

Yes my family is devastated by the loss.

I don't just mean devistated as in a little moapy.....

 I mean heart torn out, cry yourself to sleep, 8 year old thought HE was going to the Super Bowl sad!

So, I am trying to find the positive in this situation and ironically, there is a TON of positivity surrounding the VIKINGS NOT being in the Super Bowl.

Most of that positivity surrounds MY BANK ACCOUNT!

 Take a peak at exactly what would have happened at my house IF they made it to the Super Bowl.

Tickets to this little event would have been available to us for the bargain price of $1300.00 each ticket and since my 8 year old would have physically DIED if he did not attend, we would have spent $2600.00 on 2 tickets in a not so great area JUST to watch this guy:

Savings $2600.00 (CHA CHING)

Next on the list would have been all the things associated with the VIKINGS winning the Super Bowl

 (yes, I know this is lofty)

$38.00 Saved because I totally would have made my son wear this to the game.

 $76.00 saved, I would made BOTH of them sport this awesome garb...

(Yes, I know the Superbowl is in Miami..this is FUNNIER because of that!)

Next - I can almost guarantee that my husband would have spent his life savings to errect this beauty somewhere on our property...TOTAL SAVINGS $33,814

In addition to the Mother Ship we would be paying a lawn service

 to maintain his little art project in the back yard....Again with the savings $650.00

Moving onto the smaller things in life, like my families request to make everything dinner related with this ingredient

Yeah - A years supply of VIKINGS BBQ Sauce....

$388.00 (what a bargain)!

Did you think that there would not be a redecorating request from the boys?

Well, I am sure there would be:

 

@ $147.00 a pop this saves me $294.00 Smackers!

And I am sure that my husband would want to get me some GORGEOUS jewlery to commemorate the occassion, so of course I would be surprised and delighted when I opened these beauties up:

$847.00 - Nothing but the best for me (14K baby) !

Isn't it just what you always wanted? $230.00

So, I would just like to send out a THANK YOU to the MINNESOTA VIKINGS for not only devistating my family, but saving our wallet a total of $$$$  38,823.00 $$$$

Thanks to you one of my children can go to college for a year!

Till Next Week......

T-A-R-A-H

Odd 2010 News Stories...

Ahhh what to post about...some weeks I am on the verge of a blog block the size of

New York City. And what do I do when I just can't seem to "FOCUS" on the task at hand?

 I search Yahoo & Google for fillers!

 Here are a couple "FILLERS" to fill up your Wednesday...

(You can thank me in the comment section of this post)

An Israeli news station pleaded with Israeli's to search long and hard for an unclaimed lottery ticket worth an estimated $20 million dollars...(uh hem...I think I dropped my ticket at the airport on the way out...)

Any Takers on that one????

Bejing, China

Not only were they magnificent hosts of the most recent Olympics but now I am pretty sure that they have landed the MOST special place in Nan's heart as the 1st Country AND City to have an

ALL CHOCOLATE THEME PARK!!!

(Did you guys hear that??? Nan just booked her ticket...1st class comes with all the CHOCOLATE you can eat)!

Google China

Yes, there is a Google China but perhaps not for much longer.

After having to make cuts Google decided to purchase 200 tickets to

the movie  AVATAR as a parting gift for its workers in China....

Hmmmm...Good thing they just opened up that theme park!!!

(PS...Nothing says we appreciate your work more than a movie ticket attached to your pink slip)!

Hawaii

Last but not least I could not leave the US out!

While vacationing in Hawaii with his family, the President and his family enjoyed

"SNOWBAMA'S" according to him they are a Hawaiian delicasy.

Nothing says vacation like Ray Ban's and a SNOWBAMA~

(PS..I want a vacation in Hawaii oh and while were at it, I'll take some Ray Bans too)

So what would you do with a $20 Million Dollar lottery ticket?

Tarah

American Idol Addiction...

A guilty pleasure? Perhaps. A ratings monster? For sure. 

Something that a lot of us watch? Maybe.

Here are a couple things that I would change about American Idol if I were a judge:

1. Cut the poopy auditions....I mean do I honestly need to see a bunch of kids and ADULTS who can't sing try to push a 1 hour show into 2 hours? Lets get to the meaty part of the show...not this appitizer stuff!

2. No guest judges. Not that I don't like an occasional judge but I want ELLEN.

She is awesome so just put her on already!

3. A voice box for Simon. Something with funnier voices like

Bart Simpson, Adam Sandler and Conan O'Brian options. Spice it up a little BRIT! ;)

Alright, now I know I don't have the authority to change ANYTHING

but a girl can dream can't she????

Do you watch?

Till Next Week...

Tarah

Consider yourself FACE MELTED......

I can't believe that it is Wednesday again.

Man- I am one busy lady thanks to my hubs new Apple Itouch.

This little machine is totally eating up all my spare time.

If you have not noticed, I can't even personally blog anymore because this gadget has my NUMBA...;)

So, if you own one and don't know what to load on it then here is my suggestion:

FACE MELTER

♪♪ (whoooo hoooo haaaa yeah yeah) ♪♪

This is NOT me...but this is what face melter is does tell me that this would not be HIGH- STERICAL!!

Awe...isn't this the cutest little bugged eyed baby you have ever seen?

Just stop laughing. I mean this would be soo funny if it came up when my

Mother In Law called...LOLOLOLOLO ;)

Who knew that Face Melter could also be Butt Melter...

I better write Apple and let them know this one is NOT OK!!!

On second thought, maybe I am OK with Butt Melter. I mean, it could MELT my Butt couldn't it????

Till Next Week!

TJF

Worst Christmas Gift EVA...TRY TO BEAT THIS ONE!

Welcome to the 1st installment of the
WORLD'S WORST CHRISTMAS GIFTS EVA!!!

You know it has happened to you, maybe your just too nice to admit it, but deep down inside you were thinking "WHAT WERE THEY THINKING WHEN THEY BOUGHT THIS"???

Maybe you even thought to yourself.."Does this person even really like me"?

So we flash back to the 80's.
A period in time where my hair looked like this:

And my CHRISTMAS presents looked like this:

Yes, you might be thinking to yourself  I did not know Tarah was a drummer....

well surprise surprise...SHE ISN'T but somehow my aunt

(not Mimi's mom) thought that this just screamed Tarah!!!

(It screamed something that is for sure)...

 So what did I do with this lovely? I tried to return it to KMart only to find that I would not be able to get a pack of gum with the amount that it cost..

That was one sad sad day- Only to be followed by another sad sad day.

Yeah, for a really long time I thought that I was cool but according to my Christmas gifts,

I am the EXACT opposite of cool. I mean honestly, did I request socks that had every bone and muscle listed so that I could give myself the best food massage ever?

 I must have been so annoyed thankful when I received these.

Next, I can barely contain my excitement. Because of all people, you know that your Grandmother should give you something special. She always went the extra mile to find something great and then later in life she crocheted baby blankets and quilts but she had some kind of relapse this particular year in the 80's because on Christmas morning in Hawaii Detroit, Michigan I opened these:

YES, I went to public school. Yes, it was negative 15 outside.

 No, not any pair of tights was going to cover up the plaid. NO I never wore them.

I think unless you are Hansell or Gretal you can't get away with this.

The moral of this post????

It's the thought that counts....OR IS IT?

Till Next Week......

Fall on your knees...Oh, hear Tarah Crying!

Scene:

Novi, Michigan Twelve Oaks Mall

Date:

December 1993

Time:

Who the heck knows?

Incident:

Teenage daughter and mother with shopping bags as far as the eye can see..stuffed from one arm to the next and approach cramped, congested escalator. It's Christmas time in the city.

Both females appear to have made it on said escalator with no issues. Till mother decides to joke with teenage daughter and teenage daughter loses her balance. Does NOT just tumble but rolls violently, screaming and shreeking in horror as packages and presents are thrown from the top to the bottom. "I'm stuck" I scream!

My hair (to the middle of my back) is being eating by this chomping machine. Security runs over quickly as maybe about 60 people are staring at me as if I have just fallen down an escalator but why won't they stop looking??? Maybe it is because not only was my pride cut down a notch or two but so was my hair. Totally eaten and knarley....It was bad, It had to be physically cut out of the escalator..

My Most Embarrasing Moment caught before YouTube existed? Priceless.

My new holiday tradition: Avoid Escalators at all costs!

What is your holiday tradition?

TARAH

Out of Office Notice...GONE SHOPPING....

Be Back Next Week ;)

Tarah

Operation Beautiful

OPERATION BEAUTIFUL:

Alright ~ So I try not to be very serious on my posts for this blog. However, I feel like this is something that although I don't have girls, I am passionate about. I want each girl and young woman to feel like they are beautiful JUST THE WAY GOD MADE THEM!

So....

1. Check out the video

2. Load up your purse with a stack of post it notes

3. Go to town on the mirrors in the bathrooms when you are Christmas Shopping?

4. If you snap a picture of it, send it into OPERATION BEAUTIFUL!!! They would love to see it!

TaRaH

CHECK THE MAIL.....

It's the MOST wonderful time of year! 

You go to the mailbox and find catalogs, coupons, advertisements, BILLS & most importantly...

CHRISTMAS CARDS

Come join me for a walk down Christmas Card lane...

(if any of these are your family members I apologize in advance)!

Nothing says CHRISTMAS like a bunch of hairy cats!!

Straight from the Quaterbacks mouth!

We already had a "CATTY" CHRISTMAS so heres to a DOG GONE New Year!!!

Tell us when we can open our eyes...

we are waiting for our CHRISTMAS Suprise!!!

 

If this is the "A" team then I would hate to see the "DD" team!!!

HAPPY CATMAS!!!

Have a wonderful Christmas Season!!!

Hope this lightened your day!!!